Now this one is easier to understand (Champions League Final tonight, Arsenal versus Barcelona). I’m playing football against a team with Ronaldinho in it. Problem is, the football is a normal shape, but has a blotched skin, like a potato. Worse still, Ronaldinho keeps calling it his “mother” and every time someone kicks it he cries. In the end I take him to the side of the pitch, tears streaming down his face.
‘Why are you calling it your mother?’ I scream at him, ‘We can’t play properly like this.’ Eventually he calms down. Then I take the ball on a mazy dribble the length of the pitch and score a wonder goal. Unfortunately the alarm goes off and I wake up, so I don’t know how Ronaldinho reacts to this.

Maybe I’ll find out tonight.